Adventures at Wally-world

Well, today was quite a day. After not doing anything, and enjoying a relatively lazy day at home yesterday, it was time to venture out for groceries.

It had been 24 hours since my last coffee and even that had not matched my usual java intake. I had a splitting headache and I was very cranky.

I typically park within 10 spaces of the same spot by the grocery side door. No kiding. You can pretty much stand in that first spot closest the side door and count 10 parking spaces in any direction from there....my car will be within that square.Creature of habit? Pretty much...okay... I admit, I'm OCD. Easily forgets where I park? Definately.

So when I noticed a car backing out of a spot in front of the store, I thought, why not grab it? Yeah, it's not where I usually park, but I would still be able to find my way back without much trouble. I should have known better.

As I waited (at a safe distance) for the ancient Cadillac to back out, I paid little attention to the SUV pulling into the empty spot on the other side. Just as the Caddy cleared the spot enough for me to pull in, the SUV pulls all the way through from the other side! WHAT!? SERIOUSLY?!
I just sat there, grill to grill, mouth agape in disbelief.

I begrudingly made my way to my usual spot and parked within my square.

I was seething, wanting to berate the jerk that vacated a perfectly good parking spot to steal mine! As luck would have it, we all reached the buggies at the same time. Despite the overwhelming desire to be nasty, I thought better of it. Instead, I selected one and loooking back, smiled sweetly and said " Wow, great parking space you got there! I guess you didn't see me waiting for it behind the Cadillac, huh?" The slack-jawed fellow shot a look at his wife as I walked into the store, feeling somewhat vindicated.

I managed to shop without running into any former classmates, church members or friends, either mine or those of my children. I counted that as good luck, given my somewhat less than red-carpet-worthy appearance.

I get to the check out and procedeed to check out roughly $130 worth of groceries. When I reach into my wallet, I discover that my bank card is not in it's usual spot. May I remind you, I'm a creature of habit. The fact that my bank card was not where it was supposed to be, for me, was huge. I pawed through my enormous handbag. No luck.

The cashier turns the light off her check stand and begins directing customers elsewhere. She summons the CSR. I offer to check my car, but know that it's not there. I am mortified.

Mentally, I go through the last places I know I've used it. Hard to do as panic is setting in.
On Friday I bought gas and chips and salsa from Chili's ... both in Birmingham. A quick call to the automated telephone banking confirms my last transaction is Chili's.

I call Chili's, and thankfully discover, they have my bank card! Another quick call to the bank confirms that nothing else has been charged on my card.

I make the mad dash to Birmingham to retreive my bank card, squalling all the way.

Enroute back to Walmart, I stop and purchase the largest. strongest coffee I can find. 20 ounces and 20 minutes later, I arrive back at Walmart. retrieve my groceries from the service desk,(Didn't they realize I had dairy products?) and head for home.

I guess the little push of adrenaline and 20oz of coffee was enough to beat back my splitting headache.

So tomorrow, I begin the arduous task of obtaining a new bank card. Yippee!

Questions and Answers

Sorry, I like to keep my blog lighthearted but now that I'm older, I find myself being serious over more and more things.

Thanks to a discussion by local radio personalities Rick and Bubba I've finally heard an explanation of the national debt and our government's current level of spending that I actually understand.

Welcome to the "National Debt Road Trip"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P5yxFtTwDcc

With an explanation like this, I'm sure even Scooter would be able to understand it! The question is, why doesn't everyone else?

The next segment on Rick and Bubba was about czars.
The word "czar" has frightful connotations alone. I, of course, was familiar with the traditional use of the word as the fomer ruling entity of Russia.

But my love for language got the better of me and I had to pull out my trusty dictionary (Webster's II New College Dictionary) and see what else it may mean. I found 3 meanings. The first being the Russian emperor, the second was "autocrat" ( meaning "1.a ruler having absolute or unlimited power 2. person with unrestricted power or authority." !!) and the third, listed as Informal "one in authority:leader"

Apparently, our president has appointed 32 people as "czars" over certain things. (this lists only 28).

http://sayanythingblog.com/readers/entry/a_list_of_obamas_czars

Why the president would need these 32 "czars"(persons with absolute, unrestricted power)? I guess a cabinet is not enough. Of course these people will not be able to do it alone, they will need offices and paid staff members and phone bills and lights.

Guess this is what the president meant when he said he'd create jobs.

Happy Birthday To Me...Happy Birthday To Me..

Well, news coverage of the 13th anniversary of my 29th Birthday has been overshadowed by bigger, more tragic news. One thing is certain, this birthday is going to be quite memorable. The loss of two icons from my childhood...Farrah Fawcett and Michael Jackson.


Back in the 70's I had loved Farrah Fawcett, not because she was beautiful, but because she was married to Lee Majors, The Six Million Dollar Man. I loved Lee Majors and everything about Lee Majors.


(Coincidentally, my husband got his name because his biological mother loved Lee Majors too. I know what you are thinking....his name is Heath, not Lee. Lee Majors played Heath Barkley on "Big Valley." So she named my husband Heath. It was the 70's, I think she may have had a little more than twighlight sleep when she had him..but I digress.)


I had been a "Charlie's Angel's" fan, but not because of Farrah, but because of Kate Jackson, who grew up in Birmingham. Seeing Kate every week on tv reminded me that anyone who worked hard enough could escape from Alabama. (Funny, I consider Alabama a refuge now)


Through these connections, I had begun to admire and be swept up in the phenomenon that was Farrah.


I had begun working on my feathered hair

but I did not perfect it until I was much older.....

I had loved that she was from Texas and had a Southern drawl just like I did. At the time I'd never given any serious thought to her acting ability (or lack of it at the time) and it was not until "Burning Bed" that I saw she was not just another pretty face.

I had watched, with rapt attention, the documentary of her three year battle with cancer. Her talk of strength and faith left little doubt that you can't bring a good girl, (an Angel no less) down.

Yesteday Farrah earned her real angel wings.

Unfortunately, darling Farrah was later upstaged by the quintessential showman, Micheal Jackson.

I had been a fan of Michael Jackson since I was small. During their hey-day, The Jackson Five was my favorite group. I am told that one morning at breakfast, I announced that I would be marrying Michael Jackson when I grew up. My startled mother went about telling me why I couldn't...with things like "he doesn't live here" and "he's older than you."

Little did we know...I may not have been his type.

The soundtrack of my life contains many a Micheal Jackson song. "ABC" was one of my favorite songs, as well as "Ben" that I didn't realize was about a rat until I was older. I bought "Thriller" with my Christmas money in 1982.

One of the first pep rally routines I choreographed was to "Wanna Be Startin' Somthing," followed by one to "Beat It," and one to "Thriller" that I had cut well short of it's full six minutes and spliced in Vincent Price's ominous laugh as an ending.

On my birthday in 1984(another memorable one), the Gloved One came to Birmingham to rehearse for the upcoming Victory Tour. The road crew needed a place to practice set up and tear down, along with the special effects and the BJCC filled the bill. It was supposed to be a secret, but as with any juicy gossip, word got out. The Sheraton Civic Center was mobbed with adoring fans. I remember watching on tv as MJ step out on a balcony to wave a hanky at the crowd below. My mother would not let me drive to Birmingham, so I could not join the group.

That was also the same weekend, my mother's best friend reported being visited at her mother's Trussville home, by an odd little old man, escorted by 4 other men, wanting to speak to her about Jehovah. Hmmm...

And now, both of these people will finally get to see the face of Jehovah.

I can only hope their hearts were in the right place, so that they will be too.

As for me and my birthday, I can only remind myself, that "any day above ground is a good day" and another opportunity to witness to those around me.

Exciting news!!

Hall of Famer Talks about Miracle League on Hanity!!

http://hannity.blogs.foxnews.com/2009/06/15/harmon-killebrew/

I was excited to find an email about MLB Hall of Famer Harmon Killebrew speaking on Sean Hannity's about a Miracle League event!! (Unfortunately, I didn't check my MML mail box until today, so I missed it)

This is the national exposure we need!!

Yippee!

It's Just Little League....Not the World Series

I spent Thursday evening doing something I haven't done in nearly 5 years. Something I vowed I would never do again. I went to my youngest nephew's very first All-Star game.

Now don't get me wrong, I love my nephew. It's the atmosphere of the average, American, Little League baseball park that I abhor.

I know what you are thinking..."Joy, you volunteer at a ball park." The Miracle League park is much different. Everyone is loving, supportive and there to have fun. It was after an ugly incident as a ball park mom when my husband was our son's coach that made me watch my first Miracle League game. I remember watching and thinking, " THIS is what baseball should be."

But I digress....

"Scooter is 6 and is playing for the very first time in the coach-pitch division of his hometown park league

For his first time to ever play a sport, he is surprisingly good. He has played a variety of positions with efficiency, and was chosen from his regular team to play on the All Star team, even over players that had been playing since cap ball. We were all very excited.

I rode with my mother and her husband, about an hour from our hometown to the park, out in the middle of no where. It was everything I remember from my days as a ball park mom....heat, bugs, dirt, crappy bleachers. Even the smell, a mixture of Off, sweat, Alabama red clay, and over-cooked hot dogs, was the same.

The park was your standard "clover" design, four ball fields extending out from a central concession building, that carried your standard ball park fare: Hot Dogs, hamburgers, fries, and nachos.

I will have to say my park has much better nachos. I am not even certain what we received could be defined as "nachos," bland, round, tortilla chips with congealing, canned cheese poured over them. And they were expensive! Nachos at my park (the good kind) are a full dollar cheaper. For what we paid for a plate of nachos, we could have brought them in from Chili's. I thought, "I'm blowing my diet over this?!"

The boys were very excited to be playing in new uniforms and they posed for a team photo before they warmed up. We took our seats at the top of the wooden bleachers, rubbed on (ineffective) bug repellant, and prepared for the game. That is when I identified them....the overly aggressive ball park parent.

People who do not have children, or people who do not have children that play organized team sports will have no concept of what I am about to discuss, so bear with me as best you can.

On the other hand, those who do have children, involved in some sort of team sport, will not only know exactly what I am talking about, they will also quickly identify the parent in their own organization that I will be describing. Baseball, football, soccer, hockey, tennis, volleyball...doesn't matter. Trust me, there are versions of the same people in every youth league sport across the country.

These people make up about 2% of ball park parents. They are extremely serious and extremely focused on the performance of their child and or the others on the team. They are loud, boorish, and can be violent. They have less than complimentary things to say to the officials, coaches, visitors and even their children. You have, no doubt, seen them on CNN, as they are being led away in handcuffs from their child's sporting event.

More often than not, they also have more than one child and are usually unable to keep up with whomever is not on the field. In this case, it was a little girl, about 2 or 3, who I will call "Sally."

Sally's brother was on Scooter's team and his parents set up on the front row of bleachers, by the fence between third and home. Super Mom was dressed in "daisy dukes," a halter top that showed her belly button ring, and wedge sandals. It would have been a cute outfit on a smaller girl, but the muffin top rolling over the top of her shorts made it less than appealing. I will give her credit for moving behind the bleachers to smoke, which both her and her husband seemed to do in shifts. We sat in a never ending cloud of smoke. It did little to deter the mosquitos.

The "chatter" started almost immediately, loud, boardering on unruly. Sally, drew in the dirt with her fingers, unnoticed, and it was not long before she was covered in red clay from head to toe. She had a tiny yellow cast on her left arm, the tiniest one I've ever seen. Most likely an injury sustained as she played, unsupervised, during the regular season.

Sally ran to and fro, in the open space between our field and the next. She picked up things on the ground, and sampled the nachos abandonned by her parents on the end of the bleachers. She ran back and forth, cheese covered chip in each grubby hand. I soon heard the unmistakable sound of a little mouth with too much food to swallow and turned around just in time to see her vomit all over the front of her shirt. She ran, wailing, to her mother, who only looked up from the game long enough to strip the shirt from her body. She ran around shirtless. I watched her nervously. Someone needed to. Anyone could have picked that child up and walked away with her.

A scant 10 minutes later, Sally was at her mother's side again, swaying from side to side, singing "MAH-MEE, I have to TEE TEE." The official made a rather controversial call, and Sally's mom was on her feet, shouting angrily onto the field. Sally swayed from side to side. Everyone in our section knew she had to go, right up until she did. Everyone except her mother, oblivious to puddle on the ground next to her. Obviously embarrased, Sally attempted to climb up into her mother's lap, and only then did Super Mom realize she had wet her pants.

She spanked her all the way to the car.

I looked at my mother. Her eyes told me that we were thinking the same thing.

When Sally and her mother returned, she was running, pulling Sally along by her good arm. "Whad-I miss?! whad-I miss?!" She dropped Sally's hand, and returned to her seat.

There were several bad calls, and the rules seemed to change each time our team was winning.

I watched with amazement as parents around me came unglued. Red faces and throbing neck veins were all around me. All I could think was, 'geez people, these boys are 6. It's not the World Series.' Super Mom became so beligerant, our team was "warned" that further disorderly conduct would result in an automatic out. Sally continued to play in the dirt and eventually curled up in the folding chair her father had vacated, where she fell asleep.

Unfortunately we lost, but Scooter was excited to have all his family come out to cheer him on.

As we left the park, Super Mom was carrying Sally's limp, sleeping body against her shoulder, hissing angrily about filing a complaint with the league and giving someone a piece of her mind.

On the long ride home, my mother said she could tell I wanted to intervene in the Sally situation. She asked what stopped me from saying something. I told her that I'd rather not wind up in the news....you know, "Moody Woman Killed By Crazed Little League Fan."

Memorial Day 2009

It's Memorial Day 2009, and while we will be barbequeing and enjoying the day off, we will be taking the time to remember those who fought for our country. I've made memorial flags for the grandfathers and we will be taking them to the cemetary later this afternoon.

Remember:Freedom Isn't Free

Happy Anniversary Baby...

Today is my 10th wedding anniversary!

(I'll post a pic when I can get to a scanner that works)

I woke up this morning with Barry Manilow's "Looks Like We Made It" running through my head. It's funny because sometimes it seems like we've been married forever and sometimes we look at each other and say "wow, can you believe it?" We have been together longer than the sum total of our first marriages combined, and longer than many of our friends marriages.

We had once talked about renewing our vows, including our original wedding party. I had wanted to wear my wedding gown again, but I doubt it would fit now. A party would have been nice, but thanks to the economy, we will be spending a quiet evening at home instead.

I have to laugh, as thunderstorms are in the forecast today, just as they were 10 years ago.
Two hours before our ceremony, the sky turned black and it rained relentlessly until 45 minutes before we walked down the aisle. Too late to take any photos outdoors. Attendance was sparse; we had a lot of left-over cake. The next day at church, (yes, we post-poned our honeymoon to spend our first day as husband and wife in church...our Sunday school class enjoyed cake with their coffee ) many people came up to tell us they "would have come, but it rained." I had laughed and replied "that's okay, we got married anyway."

But it was truly symbolic. The first of many storms we have weathered.

I'm told that if you can make it through the first 10 years, the rest get easier.
(of course none of those people were my parents, my step-siblings, or former in-laws...all who divorced after the 17, 25, & 30 year mark, but I guess there are exceptions to every rule, eh?)

I guess that makes sense. Couples go through a lot in 10 years time, and we are no exception.

In the first 12 months of our marriage alone, Darling Hubby had 2 total-loss car accidents and walked away unscathed; I dealt with an apendectomy, infertility, PCOD, and a hysterectomy.

In the years that followed we have been through 6 cars, a new mortgage, a refinance, a major custody fight, diabetes, alternative school, O.D.D, juvenile detention, and boot camp, clinical depression, a baseball-sized breast lump (benign), declining health of our parents,a land despute with a utilty company, the death of 2 grandparents, hypertension,2 clothes dryers, facing and overcoming financial ruin, acne, a year of car-pooling in the lone car, A.D.D., obesity, 3 bleeding ulcers, 8 lawn mowers, sleep apnea, and a stroke scare. There was even a one week seperation about five years ago.

I'm sure there is more, but this is all that comes to mind.

And I am sure there is more to come.

But just as the couple in the old adage about the wedding bell, we remember, nothing is too hard when we pull together.

Maybe I will fit in my wedding dress again, in time to renew our vows on our 20th anniversary.

The next decade begins today.

Happy Anniversary Baby...I've got you on my mind.