Saturday, December 20, 2008

Redneck Mecca

(artist rendering courtesy of

It's finally here...the official redneck Mecca.

The Bass Pro-Shop in Leeds has opened, just in time for Christmas!

Not since home-town boy Charles Barkley told Jay Leno that he was running for mayor, has Leeds had so much media coverage.

Every mud-splashed, four-wheel drive with deer antler hood ornament and bull-balled trailer hitch had I-20 Eastbound hopelessly gridlocked as thousands of eager outdoorsmen (and women!) made their way to marvel at what is said to be one of the largest stores in the BPS chain. Many stood in line for up to two hours on opening day to check it out. I have heard that any item that one could think of in camoflauge print is sold there. Really, just how badly does one need a camo-covered dining room set?

It's been open a month and I am yet to darken the door.

First of all, I think it's kinda over-rated. Yes, ours has a food court, but it would have to. The next nearest food (save the hot dog counter at the Interstate Chevron) is a good mile into town. I doubt the imcomperable, but tiny, Ole' Smokey Barbeque could hold more than 10 people at a time. All of the other restaurants and fast food joints are at the Moody exit, 4 miles further up the interstate.

Secondly, I doubt that they would have anything I would need. I am NOT the outdoorsey type. My idea of "roughing it" is 5 people in a hotel room with only one bathroom. Before I agree to go anywhere with "camp" in the name, I must know if there is indoor plumbing. Anything without is more "adventure" than I care to deal with. When I was a kid, I wasn't quite as particular, but I'm not a kid anymore. My last "camping adventure" was last Thanksgiving when we went to the hunting camp in South Alabama with the in-laws. I've seen hunting camps before...little shacks with woodburning stoves and big screen tv's. And usually, if you were lucky, an outhouse rather than finding yourself a nice tree. I was so relieved as we pulled up to my in-laws place, a lovely two bedroom trailer with electricity and running water....Praise the Lord! Unfortunately, the hot water tank was barely large enough for one decent shower, let alone showers for 4 smelly men, 1 perpetually sweaty teenage boy and 6 females, 4 with long hair. Thank goodness for ponytail holders!

That being said, it's a pretty safe bet that I may never see the inside of the most anticipated business in my area. However, like many things, morbid curiosity may get the better of me. I've been told by many that there is more than just hunting and fishing gear. One friend was showing me a really nice , roomy, canvas tote bag she got there. And it's not camo. "Just check it out for yourself" she said.

I may do that, sometime around March when some of the "new" has worn off.

1 comment:

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